What it Means To Be Free
Metamorphosis, Christina Mokwa + Katherine Alt (2025)
Digital collage
What It Means to Be Free
(in 500 Words or Less)
To be free means a constant sharpening of the mind — the New York Times crossword puzzle, endless therapy, the kind of sports that require a very thick blue mat inevitably stained with your sweat — the smell of regret seeping from the plastic.
To be free means to refuse comfort that comes cheaply, at least most of the time — the greasy sidewalk pizza, the too-smooth bourbon, the 10-year mistake that just won’t stop calling.
To be free means to take your clothes off at every conceivable opportunity — at the beach, in his bedroom, tending the garden in only your wellies.
To be free is to let the laugh bubble up out of you like champagne when he does the impression, makes the joke you always knew he was going to // to be free is to feel your cheeks heat as he takes the small of your back from your seat at the bar — to touch his many-times-broken hand with the kind of surety that comes from age — to see continents, and countries, and futures in those veins.
To be free means to give up the youthful self-indulgence of sanctimony.
To be free means to give up believing the illusion that you suffer alone.
To be free is to proclaim yourself a demigod, ever-reaching for the mount of your golden-eyed future // to be free means to choose your responsibilities carefully — to step lightly in an ever-changing universe // to be free is to cut a vision deep, not wide.
To be free is to take bite after bite out of the world — a great green apple — knowing it is as much for you as it is for all of us.
To be free means to orient toward beauty // to be free means to carve your soul and body from marble each day — simultaneously maker and muse.
To be free means to cast off the heavy crown of control — to trade it instead for a smile as wide as a cloudless blue sky // to be free is to let go of waiting, of wanting, of chasing, of doubting // to be free is to have nothing but the contents of your soul to keep you company.
To be free means to rediscover your own capacity for gentleness — and to spend your life opening your hand and softening your eyes.
To be free means to forgive the world — yes, for everything.
To be free means to let go of expectations.
To be free means to know yourself honestly, and to love — him, her, it, they, all.
To be free is to know that slow is smooth, and smooth is fast // to be free is to trust your instincts — to let the butterfly exit as your classroom door closes — perennially locked, in case of a school shooter.
To be free is to go where you are needed // to be free is to be of service — not in the naivety of childhood, but in the age of hard-won hope.
*Written work by Christina Mokwa – © Christina Mokwa/Mokwa LLC/Mokwa Creative Company
